Dinner was so beautiful and we ate in comfortable silence. It feels so good, sitting down with Stefan in a comfortable silence.
After dinner, we played cards and watched television. The next part that follows is always the part where we say goodnight to eachother and call it a night.
But not today. I know Stefan don’t want to pressure me into anything and that’s why I’m more determined to be with him. I just don’t know how to go about it.
As we watched television, I snuggled up against him and kissed his jaw. We haven’t really talked about Stefan’s future destination.
He had lived outside of Magnolia for the past three years. What if he decides to go back?
“What are you thinking about that has your face all scrunched up?” He asked, drawing my attention.
I smiled at him and shook my head. He eyed my mouth lingeringly and my tongue fluttered out to lick my lips.
He groaned softly and dipped his head, his mouth brushed mine, his teeth nipping at my lower lip to make it part for him before his warm mouth moved on mine with a slow, lazy pressure that knocked any thought out of my mind.
His arms swallowed me gently, folding me into his powerful body while he taught me how much two people could tell each other with one long, slow kiss.
It was unlike every other kiss we’ve ever shared.
It was almost like going back in time to three years ago but the kiss he’d given me then was nothing like this. He was easy with me, gentle, coaxing my mouth to open for him, to admit the deep, expert penetration of his tongue.
The silence was only broken by the sound of TV and rough whisper of our breath as we kissed more and more hungrily.
I can no longer control my erratic breathing. Stefan pulled away from me. “I want you, Tera. You probably know that but I want you so damn much for the past three years.” He whispered to my lips
“I want you too, Stef.” I admitted.
“God, I don’t want to rush—”
“You are not rushing me.” I cut him off, softly. “I’ve always been yours…always. Make me yours completely, Stefan. Please…”
He didn’t need anymore coaxing because he lifted me into his arms and carried me to the bedroom.
One by one, he unfastened my clothes, parting the lapels as he went. There was no urgency in his motions, just a practiced ease that I know is intentional.
He bent to nuzzle my neck as he tugged the dress away. Tiny prickles danced across my skin. He removed the dress and then the bra.
I stood in from of him in my panties. He looked at me so blatantly. Not with repulsion like Daniel, but with admiration.
“You’re beautiful, baby.” He spoke reverently.
I shivered and leaned back, wanting more of his heated kiss. And he gave it to me.
We kissed for a while before he trailed kisses down my neck. His mouth found the turgid peak of one breast. My leg almost buckled but he held me upright as he took my nipple into his mouth.
We kissed as I helped him to remove his shirt.
He pushed me to the bed, following me too to break my fall. My back met the cool bed and his weight settled slightly on top of me.
My mouth found his again, licking and kissing her way down to the hair-roughened hollow of his chest.
His hands cupped and kneaded my buttocks before his hands released my ass to come back to my breast.
I threw my head back while he thumbed both nipples forced outward by his grip. He came down over me, his body pressing against my softness.
I marveled at their differences, how hard he was, and yet how careful he was not to hurt me.
He moved down my body, his mouth open as it grazed along my midline. His breath was scorching against me, his tongue warm and slightly rough. His hands followed, firing my senses.
My back bowed as I arched into him, seeking more of his mouth, of his touch. All my breath left me when he parted my legs and his fingers carefully found the sleek, damp flesh. He stroked and then spread my folds wider as he lowered his head.
“Oh…” I closed her eyes and twisted restlessly as his tongue found me. Electric currents raced from my pelvis to my breasts, tightening them to puckered buds.
I want more. I want to feel him inside me.
“Please, take me…please I can’t wait anymore.” I gasped.
“Me too.” Stefan groaned, his voice tight as he raised himself to level up on top of me. “I want to be inside you so much the need has become a physical ache.”
I opened my eyes to see him braced over me, his expression one of intense pain.
I reached out to touch the harsh lines across his face, wanting to ease the tension etched there.
“Come to me,” I whispered. “Fill me.”
“I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Never.” I reassured him. “Even if you do, it’s a welcomed hurt.”
He closed his eyes and eased forward. I was still battling the fire when something hard nudged at my entrance.
I opened around him, and she marveled at the delicious sensations that pulsed in my groin.
My body surrounded him, inviting him further, clinging like a second skin.
“Hold onto me,” he rasped. “I’ll make it quick.”
I have no idea what he meant, but I gripped his shoulders, determined to please him. With one powerful surge, he thrust into my untried body.
“Owww!” I sobbed as the pain overwhelmed me for a few seconds. I felt a slight tearing, but almost as quickly as I became aware of the pain, it started fading.
“Sorry baby. So sorry.” He grounded as he kissed all over my face. He held himself tight above me, not moving until I adjusted to him.
I felt so many things. Slight discomfort as my body fought to accept his intrusion. But also the stirrings of something wonderful. I felt itchy, alive, like I could crawl right out of myself.
I needed him to move. Wrapping my legs around him, I lifted my hips higher, desperate to appease the ache deep within me.
Stefan’s hands were tight at my hips.“Please,” I begged. He groaned.
It was the sound of the sweetest agony. And then he finally began to move.
He withdrew, but before I could protest, he thrust again, seating himself deeper than before. My gasp echoed across the room.
“Am I hurting you, honey? I’ll stop.”
“No! Please. I need you. Please, I ache so much.” I can’t believe this needy voice is mine.
“Ahh, Tera. You’re so sweet. I’ll take care of you, honey. Just hold onto me tight.”
I would have done anything for him in that moment. I held on tight.
He began to move harder and faster. More demanding. Taking but giving back with each thrust.
I went slick around him, and suddenly he didn’t seem quite so unbearably large inside my passageway. I still feel so full though.
The friction became unbearable, and I feared I’d burst. Higher and higher I climbed. I gripped him with a fierceness alien to me.
Every muscle tensed in anticipation of something so sweet, so pleasurable. And then I tumbled out of control, my body flying in a hundred different directions.
I quivered around his thick shaft as he pushed and strained against me. Then, he was coming too with a breathless groan.
Our breath mingled. Our noisy gasps filled the air.
Tears burnt my eyes, tears of everything I’ve been through. Tears of everything I will still go though. Tears of love.
“Did I hurt you? I’m so sorry, baby.” His breath hitched as he looked at me with concern.
My hands caressed his hair-roughened chest with an ardor that came not from experience, but from longing.
“You didn’t hurt me. Oh Stefan, I love you so much.”
He smiled and kissed my tears. “I love you too, Astera. Sincerely and wholeheartedly.”
Tears filled my eyes again. Can someone die from too much feelings?
I laid there languidly as Stefan cleaned us up before he came to lie down beside me. We tangled together and stayed that way.
Hours after Stefan had gone to sleep, I laid there in the darkness, a new heaviness settling over my heart.
What will I do if Stefan asks me to marry him?
That is the question that built a home inside me and refused to go. It scares me a lot because the truth is that I don’t want to get married ever again.
I barely made it out of my first marriage.
What will I do?