The story is inspired of the Holy Spirit, based on the combination on many real-life experiences and lessons learnt from them.
The story is a contribution to the body of Christ; thus, the electronic version can be shared without any changes whatsoever.
We pray that God would open our eyes to learn of Him always so that our marriages won’t lead us to hell.
That faithful morning, I cried to my Pastor’s house. I was fed up; my bags were packed. I had just finished telling my husband every bitter word I can remember in the dictionary. I fabricated new words that best described a monster that he is.
Yes, he is a monster, he acted so nicely during the courtship. But as soon as I became Mrs. Momoh, all hell was let loose. There is nothing that I did that was good.
I had a well-paying job as a factory manager in Lagos. I had a driver and I had an expense account. But after six months of marriage I thought I had gotten pregnant and Ige my husband let all hell loose over the fact that my work will kill the baby. Unfortunately, three months later my period came back and thus more war. I left my job to please him and became a full time house wife.
But by then he was no more around to make love to me, he was always coming home late. I discover strings of relationships on his phone and when I confronted him, he complained that since I killed the baby and can’t make another one, he needs girls to calm his nerves.
Whenever I complain, he leaves the house. If I don’t talk, he leaves the house. When I beg, he gets angry. If I fight, he gets angry. If I report to Pastor, he gets angry. If I cry, he leaves the house.
I was running mad and crazy. I didn’t have any self-esteem again. I was no more going to church regularly. He was sleeping with sisters in the church. He looks like an easy person to the world at large but a demon inside the house. I couldn’t get pregnant. I was sleeping alone every ovulation.
Last night, I discovered through his phone that another girl was pregnant for him and she wants marriage else she would terminate the pregnancy.
My husband was pleading to her not to. He was ready to do anything just to have the baby. I confronted him and he slapped me and called me barren.
That was the last straw that broke the camel’s back. All hell was let loose. I spoke out my bitterness.
I decided to first report myself to Pastor, actually I don’t really have a place to go. But I needed to get out of the house of Ige the monster.
Pastor listened as usual, his wife was holding me and trying to comfort me. I was too broken.
Pastor Emmanuel asked me this question; Sister Joy, is this the future you imagined and prayed for yourself when you got married?
Hell no! I don’t pray this for my enemies!! I replied.
Sister Joy, pray and fight for your marriage. You have been fighting wrong and fighting dirty. If you are ready, I’ll teach you how to pray and fight right. Pastor said.
I laughed despite my situation, Pastor Emma, you don’t understand. For the past 9.5 years, I have not been sitting and doing nothing. I am a Christian, I have prayed, fasted, gone for prayers on the mountain, I got ulcer from praying and fasting. I was fatter before. Pastor you don’t understand ooo.
Pastor’s wife was now crying, in my mind I felt, abi ooo, mummy understand what I was saying, that’s why she is crying too, but I noticed she was not only crying, she was beckoning on her husband to talk but Pastor didn’t want to talk.
I was curious, what is Pastor hiding, did they know about the woman who’s pregnant or what!!!
Pastor’s wife opened her mouth and said, sister Joy, some years ago, Pastor was in your shoes and I was the one who beat him out of the house and I was pregnant for another man.
Now this is turning to African story. Our gentle Pastor’s wife beating our Pastor? Ahhh
If you have seen the two of them, their love is not of this world…..
To be continued….
OH THIS MY HUSBAND
If you have seen the two of them, my Pastor and his wife can’t do without one another, they can’t stay far from each other. Pastor’s wife dotes on him like a woman deep in love.
That Pastor’s wife could have beaten her husband was a hard pill to swallow.
Then Pastor Emma spoke; yes, sister Joy, my wife was every bit like your husband and even more….
Of course, prayers and fasting seems to have failed. I was embarrassed and fed up. She had many s£x friends and sleeps at home only during weekends. She drinks and clubs and if I confront her, she will fight back. The only reason I didn’t beat her was because I had sworn not to be a wife killer like my dad.
I was on a 40 days dry fasting on the mountain, when I got a visitation on the 13th day from an old man who asked me; Young man you have marital problems and you have allowed your house to burn down.
I got angry and replied; baba, she burnt down her life, mine and our home, she is a demon that I got married to and I wish God will kill her so I can move forward. I can’t even have s£x with her, I don’t want STD or HIV, I kept ranting in anger….
The baba was just looking unperturbed. Not moved. When I finished, he gave me four verses and he left. I wrote it down just because I had a pen in my hand while he was speaking.
2nd Corinthian 10:6
I continued my fasting and praying without reading the verses. I got ulcer by day 15. I was rushed from the mountain to the hospital.
The Pastor on the mountain had even told the nurses not to allow me to come back to the mountain again. My bags and belongings were under the hospital bed. I spent four days there and not one call from my wife.
I got home to discover a man’s boxer in my bathroom. I lost all strength to pray. I broke down in tears.
At this point, I was so engrossed in Pastors’ story that I didn’t know when mummy stood up, I only saw her coming back with coffee. Ahhh food and drink is the last thing on my mind. I motioned to Pastor, abeg continue the gist.
He continued; at this point of my helplessness, I noticed the verses I wrote on my bible. I read it in the order I jotted it down.
House burnt down by me from 2nd Corinthian 10:6, Ephesians 5:25, John 3:16 & Ephesians 3:20
I opened the bible to read these verses. The gist of it all is that, I am supposed to love my wife to the point of death just as Christ loves and died for the church, it’s after this that God will deal with her. And finally, I have the power to get anything I want from God.
That was like a vision, it suddenly dawned on me that I have work to do too not just prayers.
I was fed up with the kind of marriage I was stuck in and I made up my mind that this reality is not what I prayed for.
This reality is not what God promised me.
This reality can’t be found among God’s promises for my life.
I read in the bible that by myself I can create the kind of wife I wanted. I can design how she should look. I can create how much she can love me. That power has been given to me.
So, I sat down and spend three days going through the bible and I designed a plan.
This plan made my wife who she is today and I am not going to tell you the plan, I will walk you through the process.
So, sister Joy let me ask you again, is this the future you imagined and prayed for yourself when you got married?
I said no sir.
Then are you willing to fight right to get your original dreams back as regards your marriage?
I was crying again now and managed to sniff…. yes sir, I replied.
Ok my sister, Pastor’s wife said, take this diary, it’s empty but we are going to fill it together.
Yes ma, I replied.
Then I remembered my bag is already packed, I have told my husband off, I started wailing again… Ahhh ehhhh ohhhh.
They thought the diary stuff is the cause of the wailing s. Haba, how can diary be responsible for that ….
I am only crying so that they won’t ask me to go back to that house oooo
Ahhh, I have made so much mouth oo…..