Deborah was tryna persuade me on teaching
people I refused, defamation is a bad
crime that needed a reprisal of such kind.
People wey I dey even bone food dey teach
them yesterday just because of one rumour
them rubbish and yeye everything wey
I do for them. Abeg, I nodey do again.
I kept to myself and remained dedicated
to my books and friendship with Deborah,
that course was one course you can’t wave
in my department, if you no pass am you
go tadan there. Some of them that persecuted
me were the ones on the front queue shouting
Gift give us the secret, nay no. Gift no
sabi anything make we go settle the lecturer,
We wrote our examination that semester
and many people were sent out of the halls.
The man spacing was mad and he brought
in brutal aliens as supervisor, any kapgam!
you are out! Naomi was sent out Eva, shall..
was just sweating upadan. I wrote what
I can write and dropped my pen then left
the hall. I dey one corner dey vibe with
music dey wait for Debby A.K.A my stepmama,
I love her fah when Naomi carried her
big bu-ttocks swaying left and right to talk
Naomi: Gift, you wicked oh! because of that small thing you carry am for mind allow all coursemates suffer like this, haba where is your church mind?
Me: even Jesus wey die for cross even get limit for grace, my dear. Judgment day for nodey, just take this one as your judgment day for wickedness.
waka commot from there, Deborah came
out looking bright and jovial. One of my
department nigga stood under the sun
till we couldn’t see him anymore after
the exam, chiaa! I felt pity, maybe my
stance was too harsh. But the question
can shock anyone that came into that
hall unprepared sha.. That year we finalised
it with mommy Deborah’s white wedding.
My papa no gree close him thirty-two teeth,
Sarah was looking like another bride but
was disappointed when the groom didn’t
appear, she was on my neck where is your
brother thingy. The year was totally sweet
and memorable, I won’t forget that year
I spent with my family and my father having
a genuine happiness in his life, I was
advising Deborah not to carry belle before
school will resume the way she was smelling
sperm sperm, issoright. She was telling
me gerrehia bad girl, we resumed with
full force. Project issues sha.. I had so
much on me that I was running
to computer centre with my laptop in hand,
we didn’t offer so many courses that semester
due to project. Before I even get myself
and my yeye project supervisor be forming
James Hadley Chase for me, pot-belle
like him, I will just punch his big belle
will deflate like tyre, he won’t see
this post, amen. Like that like that people
started crying when they saw their results,
My A stand out in that course in the midst
of the Fs rolling. That lecturer na really
radical lecturer I swear, no wonder students
were wailing when he came back. Since the
owner of the course is back they can bribe
their way through, as for Eva and Naomi.
I made sure I checked it, Eva had E and
the marlian that fu-ck everything and
club everywhere forgot to fu-ck her books
and made an excellent F.
Eva is bright
but she was too beautiful for book to admire,
na w€tin she dey reason sha.. We started
our examination in ernest and just few
courses and we were done. During this
period I meant James when my car had
issues on my way home, we got on talking
after he helped me and fixed it, then we
exchanged numbers. James was sweet
and he never stopped showing it, boom
Deborah carry belle. I started teasing her,
trust me na. I said it will be a girl and she
must be called Gift Jnr jare, but Deborah
refused that it will be a boy. Lai lai, I no
gree. James proposed marriage to me
and he proved that he isn’t a pu-ssy niggar.
Deborah: accept him na, he is a cool guy.
Me: I too young to marry.
Deborah: but you no too young to dey do mio mio with men, bah?
laughed over it, I told him I will accept
but it will be after my final exam in the
university. After we tidied the examination
the introduction date was fixed, I called
Anderson and he didn’t sound angry and
embittered the way I imagined him to
instead he acted cool and even told me
he knew about everything, I was close
to tears when he spoke soft kind words
to me. I felt loved beyond measures, when
I told him about my wedding he was restless
and he insisted that I shouldn’t marry
James, what was his reason? He was
just giving silly reasons so I still maintained
my stand. The introduction was fixed
and James with his parents came to perform
some rites, I was surprised James father
was the professor that took advantage
of me. The day was a disaster on his own,
/> the man insisted that his son will not marry
his wife, he didn’t tell anyone what he meant.
I and him were the ones that knew what
happened betwixt us, Anderson consoled
me and persuaded me to leave Nigeria
for America, Sarah was grigri when I agreed.
She was all smiles as we left Nigeria.
This was my story, I hope you learnt one
or two from it.