don’t guess again, let me tell you how it goes…
if ritababe or cherrybrown saw it, them go pick race…
Friend: see snake
We wanted to run out of the class till we saw it was a lylon they used in wrapping a ruler.
Friend: (hissing for the snake part) thanks for saving me from those ‘senseless and wahala seniors sha.
Me: gbagbe iyen, you too thank you.
Friend: why thanking me?
Me: about those girls yesternight na.
Friend: ooohw, okay! Don’t menshun!
Me: hope we dey go tonight?
Friend: No o, don’t you know dem go catch us ni. Or u donno that Mr Adesomi is doing something no one knew about to catch those that goes out of the school.
Me: yes o, I heard that from sodiq too.
Friend: you now see we can’t go anywhere.
Me: I don dey miss dammy o.
Friend: see were, don’t worry sha we go go during the break on monday.
Me: ah! How are we to do that?
Friend: no worie, no fear, I no what to do.
Me: okay boss.
Friend: anything to talk on?
Me: yes, what you said you gon tell me when we reach hostel yesterday.
Friend: about wetin be that?
Me: only God knows how you dey pass exams, about those two girls you called ‘Les something’
Friend: okay, l£sb!ans.Me: yes yes yes. Oya, jamisi!
Friend: its something simple na. You know that guys and girls, be it higher or lower animals can have S#xual intercourse with each other if they are of opposite s*x!
Friend: men are made to knack female but recently things don change.
Me: hey hey!
Friend: girls now have s*x with girls and guys too have s*x with guys.
Me: (shouted) liar, how’s that possible?
Friend: okay, forget then. Let’s change the topic since you said I’m a liar.
Me: I don’t believe jor, oya let’s have s*x together now.
Friend: I’m not a gay.
Me: what’s a gay again?
Friend: don’t worry since you aren’t ready to learn.
Me: oya na, no vex, continue.
Friend: if you talk Sh*t now, I go baff you with sand and spit.
Me: oya! Boss of life. Continue na.
Friend: ehn ehn, as I was saying before a catastrophilic faker attacked my sayings.
Me: hmm hmmm!!! Itumo?
Friend: you know I be wole soyinka’s brother?
Me: ewo were! Oya, talk jor.Me: ewo were! Oya, talk jor.
Friend: nowadays, people have gone insane. Some turned gay, some l£sb!ans, some are into bisexual acts, some are into tri-S#xual. Some now do threesome or foursome all because they ain’t satisfied and some finger themselves.
Me: eh eh, talk in details na, break am into pieces.
Friend: gay is the growing of likeness or feelings between guys which later turned into having s*x with each other, I mean man to man. They F**K through anus. As in ‘won a ma ki oko bo ara won ni idi.’ (They’ll insert J0yst!ck into each other anus)
Friend: l£sb!anism is the S#xual act between girls, an example is the type you saw yesterday where two girls were doing that thing you told me you saw.
Me: hmm hmmm
Friend: some girls believe only in l£sb!anism why some are into bisexual act as in they’ll do girls and guys together.
Me: olorun mi o(oh my God)
Friend: some girls can handle three guys at a time that they’ll be F***ed by the three guys at the same time, that one is called threesome.
Me: choi!Friend: and some girls finger themselves by digging their hand inside their virgina like a J0yst!ck dose in them if they aren’t satisfied.
Me: that one is called handsome bha?
Friend: thunder fire you! Handsome for where?